Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Rhianon
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Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby Rhianon » Wed Nov 25, 2015 5:08 pm

I thought I'd start a new thread on this topic because this is more an exploration of the nature of migration.

I read this story on the CBC this morning. As background, Canada had committed to having 10,000 refugees in Canada by the end of December, and another 15,000 by March of 2016. In general, the plan is to focus on vulnerable women, families, and others who are at higher risk (e.g., LGBT). People in communities everywhere are getting involved it what has been called "The Canada Project." Of course, not everyone is happy about the idea. Time will tell.

This article points out to me how darned hard it is for these people to leave their country and families, especially the women. Made me realize how very alone this young woman is going to feel here. (And I did kinda wonder why they had a second child while they were refugees ... but there could be a lot of reasonable explanations for that. I can be a bit judgmental at times ...)

http://www.cbc.ca/news/world/syrian-ref ... -1.3334427

Tabby
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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby Tabby » Wed Nov 25, 2015 10:12 pm

I saw that article today as well. It must be very difficult. And frightening. I was terrified leaving Canada for the us when I went there for 3 years back in the 90's and I spoke the language, knew the culture and was an 11 hour drive from home. The atrocities these folks are escaping from must be horrific to take a chance on a completely foreign country such as ours.

I think we are doing the right thing. I'm glad we're taking more time to do it, though.

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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby boots-aregard » Thu Nov 26, 2015 12:00 am

I'm rewriting our cultural orientation manual for refugees, and the first series of phone numbers we supply is crisis hot lines, because even more than medical assistance, food aid and education, mental health and not giving in to depression is critical to survival in a new land.

Tabby
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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby Tabby » Thu Nov 26, 2015 7:39 pm

What is a "cultural orientation manual" Boots? Who is this for (I understand it's for refugees but is it being prepared for government, some charity or some body else?).

We have a guy at my work who escaped Cambodia when he was 7 years old as a refugee. He watched soldiers slit the throats of his parents and his younger sister. He got away by running into the jungle and hiding there for days. He said he was terrified whenever he came across another village because he didn't know if that village had been taken over yet or not. Eventually, he found his way to a refugee camp and then was sent to Canada. He's now a successful chemist here. I can't imagine what his life was like as a child growing up here.

Rhianon
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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby Rhianon » Thu Nov 26, 2015 7:54 pm

We've found out that there is a group in our area working to set up sponsorship for a family. I'm not sure a rural area is the right place for these people to try to settle. But we're going to get involved and see what we can do. First step is to raise $35,000 (government requirement for sponsorship). If we don't make it in a timely fashion, then the money will get transferred to another sponsorship group that is closer to its goal.

My DH has been researching Syrian culture. Apparently it is normal there to stand very close to people when talking, speak loudly, and use a lot of hand gestures. He points out that it will just like when we were in Spain! (We routinely thought people were arguing, but it turned out they were just discussing the weather or whether the cherries were ripe enough to pick.)

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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby Tabby » Thu Nov 26, 2015 11:16 pm

That group sounds great! A rural area might be okay. People tend to be more involved in their community and that could help them integrate better. On the other hand they'll have less contact with other refugees and may feel more isolated.

We have syrian neighbors. They mostly keep to themselves but the kids play with the other neighborhood kids. They came to our bbq this summer and seemed to want to get to know everyone even though his English isn't very good (hers is much better so she talks more). All that said we don't really like them that much because they never cut their grass and they've let the front garden go wild and they couldn't figure out how to open the pool and ended up flooding the family next door. But that's not because they're syrian but because I don't think they know how to take care of a house and since they're new w they were afraid to ask.

Rhianon
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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby Rhianon » Fri Nov 27, 2015 1:40 am

There you go, Tabby! She wants a friend. You can be one and guide her in home maintenance. :-)

WheresMyWhite
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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby WheresMyWhite » Fri Nov 27, 2015 4:18 pm

Maybe it isn't because they are afraid to ask but culturally they don't ask questions. I don't know the Syrian culture at all but in having taught Europeans computer-related classes, I've taught many classes where they do not ask questions. In some cases, because their English is not good and in some cases, they just don't or don't in a group.

They''ve probably never seen a house with a pool or a house with a lawn. We in the US would "assume" everyone has seen a house with a lawn and knows how to care for it, but maybe they don't. Not liking them because they didn't cut their grass seems to be a bit narrow as maybe they didn't know they are supposed to.

Your neighbors, how long have they been in your country? Why did they leave Syria? Maybe something to find out before deciding that you don't like them all that much...?

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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby Rhianon » Fri Nov 27, 2015 7:23 pm

(Rather off topic, but an example of cultural misunderstandings.)

WheresMyWhite--

I once spent a few weeks in China--way before it westernized--teaching a course in computer-aided-learning to graduate students in education. They were utterly SILENT during the class! No questions. No ideas. No opinions. I had published a book on the topic, and they each had a copy that they placed on their desks every day, and they would glance at the cover from time to time. As though to say, "we've read the book, we get it." I felt I was failing miserably.

Then I talked to an "old China hand" also in the foreign experts residence. He explained that questioning would suggest I was a poor teacher, and that having an opinion about something in class would seem arrogant. And that they have a huge respect for writers, so the books were there to show me that they knew I was a published author. He suggested I invite them to come to my room any time to ask questions.

Well ... from then on I stood at the front of the class like a robot for several hours in the morning. Then "held court" in my room with tea and buns the rest of the day, seeing students one or two at a time for discussions.

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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby Tabby » Fri Nov 27, 2015 7:46 pm

My neighbors aren't refugees. They've been in Canada for quite some time - none of their kids have accents and the oldest is 14. The wife speaks English very well. The husband is in construction - it is likely he doesn't need to speak much in his job (or there are others there that speak Arabic). They will both say hi if we say hi first but they never make the first move. I supposed there could be something cultural to that. We don't think they've owned a house before - at least not in this country. They've done lots of work to the inside but they totally neglect the outside. We feel like we might come across as insulting or rude if we asked them to do anything about it. One of our other neighbors is very concerned because he's been getting his house ready to go on the market next year when he retires. He's not sure what to do either. We could call the city - there are bylaws about keeping your place maintained and I'm sure they're violating some of them (they had ragweed blooming in their garden this fall). But that's not such a nice thing to do, either. If they were more approachable it would be easier to let them know that it is important to keep your house looking tidy from the outside and to control noxious weeds. We're curious as to how they will handle the snow - they moved in late winter last year and someone in the neighborhood had already plowed their driveway. They haven't had to do that themselves yet.

Rhianon
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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby Rhianon » Sat Nov 28, 2015 1:20 am

It's a challenge, eh? Not matter what the ethnicity, getting along with neighbours is so often problematic. I tend to just push myself forward a bit, take the rejection risk. Once you've got communication, then there is a chance of resolving things. Doesn't always work, though. We have one neighbour who is always calling the powers-that-be about something or other. I'd never do that. But, darn it all, his calling got the messy guys on our street to clean up their act!

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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby Tabby » Sun Nov 29, 2015 10:36 pm

We have such a diverse neighbourhood that it truly is hard to blame anything on ethnicity in this case. I'm tempted to approach these neighbours given the current situation regarding refugees. Canada has promised to take 25,000 and up to 1,000 may end up in my city. I have been going through stuff to donate for this - I have tons and tons of bedding as well as winter coats, boots and sweaters and other things they are going to need. The local organization isn't ready to accept this stuff yet - they are still trying to figure out where these people are going to go. I suspect my neighbours have financial difficulties and probably can't sponsor a family (but who knows) - but they must be involved in the community somehow. I thought about approaching them about the stuff that I have. I would happily give "dibs" to people they are trying to bring over. I have an electric blanket that is a little rough around the edges and doesn't look like much but it works great. I also have an hand-made wool sweater that I made for my ex-husband and somehow ended up with me. I can't give it back to him and I can't use it but certainly the refugees can. I have tons of stuff like this that they can have. I've been going through linens this weekend - have tons of flannel sheets they will totally appreciate in this climate. Next weekend I'm doing boots and coats. I know I have lots of those.

It's just so hard because they aren't that approachable. It is also way past the season when people sit outside. Would it be weird to knock on their door about this?

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Re: Putting a Face on the Syrian Refugees

Postby WheresMyWhite » Mon Nov 30, 2015 12:44 am

Tabby, IMO, I'd knock but also just for a 'chat' to start. I hear what you are saying about 'ethnicity' but a variation on that may be what you are seeing... their culture is not the same as yours. I personally don't consider taking culture into consideration a ding against ethnicity per se.

Do you know how long they've lived in Canada (right?)? Or why they are no longer in Syria? If not, those might be good ice breakers to understand where they are coming from... that might be the comfortable lead in on yard care (maybe they've never lived in a home where you had to take care of a yard??) or if they know of anyone who might be coming from Syria that could use your help?

I know you want to help. I don't know how they might perceive your offer of help and generosity so tread lightly and kindly as I know you can ;)


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